This probably happens to the majority of the women that recently became mothers for the first time: they feel as if they really know nothing about taking care of the baby, feeding him, what to do when he doesn’t seem to stop crying, how to dress the little one. Of course, immediately older relatives or friends that have children appear and everyone is competing to give you the best advice. And the amount of advice is huge but many of the indications contradict themselves.
Actually, as time passes, you start feeling like you are in some kind of rollercoaster and don’t know who you should listen to first…it seems that all your friends have nothing better to do than give you advice. Even the mommies from the park, that you really don’t know, are now giving you advice and sharing their opinions regarding your baby: he looks too thin or too fat for his age, he is too quiet or too noisy, and how you should feed him, as if you didn’t already know that.
The truth is, that no matter how many books have been written to better explain this, being a parent is a science forever growing and changing, sometimes in a trembling way. What was good two or three years ago, today is outdated and not recommended, like placing your baby on his belly when you get him ready for sleep or giving him solid food before he turns four month old. And if in your family there hasn’t been a baby for a long time, you should expect such out-dated advice. You must try not to loose your patience because they mean well and they can’t know what the latest discoveries in this area are.
It is true that sometimes this can get very annoying. They will all say “I’ve raised a child already, you haven’t!”, but again, try not to lose your patience. In the mean time, you must claim your point of view and always stay in touch with your pediatrician – that is the best you can do for the little one. Because your family members care about the baby’s health they will be flexible and won’t try to impose at any costs.
The only problem that should really matter to you should be the following: because you are anyway lost and confused and why not, overwhelmed by the new responsibilities, there is the risk that this advice you are getting to make you wonder whether you are a good mother or not.
But, once you gave birth, the maternal instinct appears, it is actually there even when you are pregnant. No matter what everyone else says, even if you are not an expert when it comes to babies, you are however an expert in everything relater to your baby! You know and feel best what he wants and needs. Trust your instincts – you are probably doing much better that you know.